Expectation, Escapism & Creative Blues

I know; it sounds heavy. I’ll try to keep it lighthearted.

I hit one of my lowest points yesterday, not creatively, but as an individual. I learnt the hard way that grief isn’t a linear process, not at all – even a year later, that raw realisation can come flooding back and consume you. I won’t get into specifics, but I did tweet about it here.

I’m doing okay today, and generally too. It was just a rough few days, and I know that’s normal every now and then. This morning, I’m back to my normal self – except I decided to counter the benefits of my usual green tea with a chunk of Galaxy chocolate (because self-love, right? Right..) I guess I just needed to process the grief within myself, allow myself to face it again and allow myself to heal.

Later on, when I felt significantly better, I reflected on the smaller daily choices we make and how they affect us. How tools like social media often worsen things when we’re experiencing sadness, and how we find ourselves leaning on a wave of unattainable, false and usually consumerism-driven content. It digs the hole deeper. We don’t need things to feel better, we need each other.

I scrolled through all of the social media apps on my phone last night, and I spring cleaned.

As a creative, there are days when I feel low on creativity, and like I lack resources or space. I want everything to be perfect. And I want it to happen at the exact moment I’m in. But I know this is an unrealistic standard to set for yourself, to push yourself from a crawl to a Mo Farah-style sprint; growth is a process we should respect.

Art is not about perfection, and it’s not entirely about the finished product; there is so much character and value in the journey, the process, the growth. The world around us today, and in the palm of our hands, is full of that which is quick and often instant – but beautiful things take time. Art takes time. We must learn the art of time. To learn and persevere and adapt and improve at a natural pace, and feel good about it. To celebrate it as a privilege.

Your time will come – but your time is also now.